Why I love it:

• The contrast between, and wide variety of reactions: surprised, amused, completely oblivious, total deadpan, somewhat concerned, “I’m way to stressed to care about that”. Priceless!
• That occasional pause of uncertainty where people’s brains decide how they are going to react.
• The film (intentionally or not) has great dramatic structure. She sat at just the right location to have the dramatic climax at that sweet spot in time. Nice long build-up lures the viewer into a false sense of security, then BAM! Unexpected-Event-desu! Followed by nice quick resolution.
• My brain is now going crazy thinking of weird and wonderful places to put my camera (NO, not THOSE kind of places, geez!)

BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE! I can feel a new reality TV genre emerging…

Spotted these in the wild. 50c a packet. The verdict? Too sweet, like strawberry. I still prefer classic grape.

1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil
1 teaspoon light soy
juice from 1/2 small lemon
drop or two of sesame oil (careful)
about 6 grinds black pepper
1/2 teaspoon mirin
1/4 teaspoon fish sauce

Shake well in a jar. Best served chilled.

It makes about 1/4 cup. If you don’t have mirin you could probably use some dissolved sugar. I was surprised this actually emulsified; it must be the soy.

It might be nice over cold soba noodles, too. Maybe with double the soy.

McMeh takes the grand prize because it sums up the burger quite well. Nothing to write home about and definitely very forgettable. Runners up included:

• McFallApart – because mine did, literally. Then I proceded to fall apart emotionally at the prospect of mending my deconstructed burger
• McRemoveableCheese - because you can remove the cheese. It’s not that plastic cheese that melts everywhere but some kind of imitation genuine cheddar I suspect
• McFresh – this is my attempt at satire. Mine tasted like it was made at least two hours before
• McBowelCancer – I can feel the cells refusing to die already…
• McShit, McArse, McShitArse, McButtocks, McToilet - need I elaborate?

All I can say is I wish this Subway that’s under construction would hurry up and open.

Ingredients

freshly grated ginger (about the size of a thumb)
3 good sized bay leaves
1 cinnamon stick, broken
cloves & cardamon pods (8-12 of each, smashed)
5 grinds black pepper
2 star anise, smashed

3 dessert spoons black tea (Madura is best and definitely no teabags!)
3 cups soymilk (preferrably Bonsoy)

The Real Method

I have to say, no powdered ingredients please, and the ginger must absolutely be fresh. And smash the cloves, cardamon & anise like you mean it

Boil all spices in 5-6 cups water for about 10 minutes.
Remove from heat, add tea and bring back to boil. Switch off and let brew for 3-5 mins.
Then add soymilk and reheat until almost boiling but do NOT boil.
Strain and add honey to taste.

L.S.A. stands for linseed, soy & almond. You can get it in most supermarkets, probably in the health food section

Add 1 tablespoon to your porridge before cooking. Top with honey and crushed nuts. Enjoy!